Number One: Come out to your loved ones in a way that is honest, unreserved, and will not kill your mother or emotionally cripple your father. Also, avoid the temptation to retort when Zeus says "Two? In my own family?" and shifts his eyes to Athena, goddess of wisdom. Later, in private, encourage Ares to follow your lead.
See the whole list by Jason Rhode at McSweeney's.
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